How To Make Yourself Cum: The Simpli Orgasm Guide

How To Make Yourself Cum: The Simpli Orgasm Guide

Let's be real — nothing feels more wonderful than when the stars align to deliver that "oh" so glorious O. Sure, feeling butterflies in your gut after an amazing first date is hard to beat, and there's no denying the tremors you’ll feel receiving a raunchy sext, but if you ask us, having an orgasm is an experience like no other. If you're lucky enough to know how to make yourself cum, it's something you can enjoy over and over (and over) again. Wink, wink. 

Whether you beat your meat or DJ downstairs, masturbating is something almost everyone does. A recent global study discovered that a whopping 74 percent of Americans view masturbation as a form of self-care

And seeing as practicing self care is known to boost happiness, enhance confidence, and increase productivity, you may want to consider jumping on the bandwagon if you haven't done so already. Masturbating doesn't only feel like a one-way ticket to pleasure town, but chasing after that highly prized O is good for your health, too. 

So, how does one make themselves cum, you ask? We've got the answer.

Whether you're a masturbating newbie or struggling to get your motor going, our in-depth orgasm guide will give you the tools to O like a pro. Ready to blow more than just your mind? Let's g-Oh!

The Basics: What's an Orgasm?

It's the best thing since sliced bread. 

An orgasm is the rhythmic contractions of the genitals; it's the climatic peak of sexual excitement in the human body. As sexual excitement flurries, muscles tense, flex, twitch, and contract involuntarily while body tissues swell with blood. At climax, there's an intense feeling of pleasure in the nether region and throughout the body, as pent-up sexual tension is finally released through a toe-curling, mind-numbing "Oh."

Hold Up — Isn't Climax and Orgasm the Same? 

Climax and orgasm. Despite what you may think, these two seemingly interchangeable sensations are not the same. Who knew? Consider minds blown, erogenous zones tickled, and libidos stirred. 

Of course, swapping one word with the other is not unheard of, so don't feel bad if you've been using them interchangeably. But, if you're on a mission to give yourself the best feeling of pleasure via orgasm, we'll be honest — they're important to differentiate. So, let's have a quick sexy vocab lesson, shall we? 

In short, an orgasm occurs when the body reaches an incredibly relaxed state of intense pleasure — a state of mind. On the other hand, a climax is where the body experiences those few electrifying seconds of pelvic floor muscle contractions (think: ejaculation — for some). If you think of an orgasm as a mountain, the climax is the absolute peak. 

Once you reach the tippy-top of the climactic summit, you'll begin your descent back down the mountain, where you can remain in this heightened state of orgasmic pleasure for much longer — and with practice, as long as you want — than you can with a climax.

So, What Exactly Does an Orgasm Feel Like?

Anyone who has ever had their genitals blessed with an orgasm is likely to describe the feeling in a way that's different from the next. In other words, the sensation can feel different from person to person. 

You might describe it as frustratingly blissful or magically delicious, while your bestie says O-ing is like a wave of awesomeness that numbs the senses. These oh-so-wonderful feelings are largely due to happy hormones called endorphins that are released into the bloodstream, which cause intense pleasure and relaxation. 

You might feel flushed or especially warm and experience rapid muscle spasms or twitching all over, but mainly concentrated in your nether regions. 

As you O, your heartbeat will be much faster, and your naughty bits will be extremely sensitive to the touch. This is because your sweet spot contains many super-sensitive nerve endings, and each person reacts differently to stimulation.

Hot Tip: Feeling a wee bit too sensitive down there and need a breather? Speak up and ask your partner to stimulate another part of your body (nipple play, anyone?) or turn your toy settings down a few notches until your ready. 

Nipple Play Erect Nipple Gel

Pussy or Cock: Do Orgasms Vary? 

Every body experiences rhythmic contractions down south during orgasm, but in general, pussy orgasms last longer than cock orgasms. 

Those of you with cocks also have complimentary ejaculation with their orgasms, which is a separate event from having an O, but it just so happens that they typically go hand-in-hand (pun intended). That said, it's important to note that some pussy owners do experience ejaculation as well, but it's not as common. 

This is because you don't need an eggplant in your pants to sploosh; you just need a urethra, which — spoiler alert: everyone has.

Masturbation 101: The Art of F***ing Yourself 

Some call it "me time." We call it art. Like creating a masterpiece that evokes powerful emotion, touching yourself in a way that makes you O takes skill. 

In other words, practice makes perfect. With this in mind, let's explore why you should hone your craft with some incredible science-backed masturbating benefits below, shall we? 

Benefit #1: A Date With Palmela Handerson Reduces Stress.

Are you feeling especially anxious as of late? First, know that you're not alone, and second — try f***ing yourself. Seriously. Getting to orgasm will force you to get out of your head, where it's easy to be preoccupied with stress and tune into your body's reactions to pleasure. 

Plus, according to a recent study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, orgasm releases the hormone oxytocin, which results in decreased levels of cortisol (the "stress hormone") in the body. And when cortisol levels are in check, so are feelings of stress and tension. 

Benefit #2: The Five-Finger Shuffle Is a Natural Pain Reliever.

Next time you want to self-soothe your aches, consider opting for a fun sex toy instead. 

Masturbation is a fantastic natural remedy to combat pain. This is because the pituitary gland in the brain gets activated during the deed and releases oxytocin, endorphins, and serotonin, which are hormones that are notoriously known to — you guessed it — relieve pain. 

Of course, releasing sexy hormones won’t heal an injury like a broken bone or a torn ligament, but getting jiggy with yourself can certainly help lower your pain sensitivity. 

Hot Tip: Is Shark Week wreaking havoc on your uterus? Try fighting painful period cramps with a vibrator. You'll thank us later.

Benefit #3: Diddle Your Skittle To Boost Heart Health.

Contrary to the popular belief that rigorous sexual activity can up your risk of a heart attack, regular orgasms can actually help protect your ticker against cardiovascular disease. 

Yup, it's true — according to a recent study, researchers found that participants who engaged in the act once a month or less were 45 percent more likely to kick the bucket due to heart disease than those who experienced two or more Os per week. 

So, if you cancel weekend plans to stay home and diddle yourself, just tell your pals it's for your health. Hey, you wouldn't be lying.

Benefit #4: Dopamine Farming Makes You Happier.

Playing with your spicy button is always a hoot, but did you know it can make you happier too? According to experts, masturbation activates the parts of the brain responsible for pleasure, like the thalamus and hypothalamus, while decreasing the parts responsible for stress and tension, like the lateral orbitofrontal cortex. 

So, if you're feeling blue, consider ramping up your solo sex life to help flip that frown upside down!

Benefit #5: Getting Handsy Supports Quality Sleep.

Are you struggling to summon the Sandman? You can do many things to improve the quality of your slumber, but if you're looking for the best way to catch some Zzzs, put your hand in between your legs and get to work. 

After climbing up the climactic mountain to finally reach that highly-prized O, a gentle wave of relaxation typically washes over the body, putting you in the perfect state for a good night's rest. We're also bathed in oxytocin and endorphins — the feel-good chemicals that can help us get to sleep easily and sleep more deeply.

How To Perfect Your Favorite DIY Hobby 

After reading about those steamy benefits, we're sure you're chomping at the bit to get better acquainted with your nether regions. We don't blame you; playing with your hotspot to make yourself O isn't only euphoric but a whole lot of fun — especially when kinky toys are involved. 

That said, making yourself cum can be tough. Remember, cumming is an *art* you must cultivate to get the results you're after (in this case, a puddle of love and a glorious O). 

For some lucky ducks, splooshing comes naturally, but for others, achieving orgasm takes a little time and a lot of practice. With this in mind, here are the general steps you can take to make yourself cum.

Step #1: Don't Worry, Be Happy

First things, first — get your mindset in check. The more upset, frustrated, or angry you get about not being able to make yourself squirm, the more pressure you put on yourself and the less likely you are to reach the promise land. 

So chill out and enjoy the ride because it'll be pleasurable, even if it takes a while to reach your destination. 

Step #2: Take It Slow

When you begin your journey of self-exploration, remember to take things slooow. Explore different techniques, enjoy the build-up of excitement, and stretch your self-pleasure out with edging (do it). 

Despite what you may think, foreplay doesn't just have to be for sex with a buddy! Once you finally reach your sexual summit, it'll pay off as an incredible, body-numbing O.

Step #3: Push Through the Awk

If you're brand-spankin' new to touching yourself, you'll probably feel a little awkward at first. Remember that what you're doing is a perfectly healthy, natural, and wonderful part of being human. In other words, there's no need to feel ashamed. 

Try to push through any awkwardness by redirecting your attention to your breath. Close your eyes, take some deep breaths, and think sexy thoughts while continuing to work magic downstairs. The goal here is to relax your body and mind to truly enjoy the exploration you're about to embark upon.

Step #4: G-Oh Time

Now that you and your sexy bits are on very friendly terms, it's go time! 

Once you're in the mood and feelin' real spicy down below, find the motion that seemed to provide the most pleasure during playtime and keep at it. As you become more aroused, you should feel your entire nether region become engorged and more responsive to your touch. 

Step #5: The Big O

After giving your super sensitive bits some love, you'll start to feel it's really happening. Apply more pressure, tug faster, or speed up your finger play and enjoy the magic moment — you've earned it!

Jerk Offs Only

If you're new to the world of awesomeness (aka "masturbation"), we'll let you in on a little secret: cock owners and pussy owners require different things to make them cum. While the general steps listed above will guide you in the right direction to reach that oh-so glorious O, the tips below are especially helpful for those with a cock and balls. 

Tip #1: Meet Your Taint.

Fingers meet taint — or your perineum. You know, the questionable strip of skin between your prized jewels and butt? This highly erogenous zone responds extremely well to sexual stimulation because the hot spot is packed to the rim with nerve endings making it super sensitive. 

Try applying some pressure to this area during "me time," and you might experience multiple orgasms. 

Tip #2: Explore Your Backdoor.

You're missing out if you haven't dabbled with butt stuff yet. Sure, exploring the unknown can be nerve-wracking, but we promise — once you do, there’s no going back. 

Like the taint, your butt is full of highly sensitive nerve endings, so giving it some attention will make your entire body tingle in preparation for that coveted climatic finish. New to having your booty hole fondled? Start by gently inserting a finger (don't forget lube — you're welcome). 

Adam & Eve Lube

Once you're comfortable and have realized the magic that comes from butt stuff, consider a sweet plug like this one from yours truly, Simpli Pleasures. Not only is it a comfy-cozy size for beginners, but it also features an intuitive remote control — perfect for solo or partnered encounters!

SIMPLI Vibrating Plug 03

Tip #3: Tickle Your P-spot. 

Equivalent to the elusive G-spot (although maybe not so elusive), the prostate is another erotic zone that you can diddle to make orgasmic magic happen. You can stimulate it externally by applying some pressure to your taint, but if you're on a mission to maximize your pleasure (which, always), you'll have to do a little anal probing. 

Lube up the soft pad of your finger and gently stick it up your butt about two inches. Once you feel the small, walnut-shaped lump, apply some light pressure and enjoy the trip to O-town. 

Optimale Prostate Massager

Hot Tip: Want to take the fun up a notch? Take your P-spot by storm with our Optimale Prostate Massager. This soft and curvy silicone massager is specifically designed to provide prostate-owners with incredible orgasms. Just cuddle your booty hole a bit with lube before insertion — especially if you're a beginner!

Slippery When Wet

For some kitty owners, the big O is as elusive as a leprechaun's pot of gold at the end of a rainbow — often talked about, never experienced firsthand. In fact, according to a recent study, a whopping 10 to 15 percent of women have never had an orgasm (yikes!), whereas an unbelievable 95 percent of men say they always orgasm.

Not to worry, though — here are a few orgasmic tips and tricks to enhance your solo play: 

Tip #1: Toys, Toys, Toys.

And did we say toys? 

More than 50 percent of pussy owners use vibrators to help them climb the climactic mountain to orgasm. But that's not all — according to one recent study, researchers found that those who used vibrators reported greater sexual satisfaction than those who didn't. So, if you're struggling to make yourself cum, spoiling yourself with awesome sex toys is a great place to start.

Not sure where to find high-quality toys to meet your sexual needs? Check us out here at Simpli, where you'll discover hundreds of toys, tools, gizmos, and gadgets to make yourself sweat, shimmy, shout, and shake.

Hot Tip: Struggling to turn your kitty into a super-soaker? Use lube. Trust us; you're hoo-ha will thank you later!

Tip #2: Get Lost in Fantasy. 

Whatever fantasy gets you hot and bothered — regardless of how dirty or far-fetched it may be — hone in on it as you flick your bean to make yourself cum. 

Fantasies can increase arousal during masturbation tenfold and add another layer of pleasure during the act. Plus, fantasizing about Thor pounding you with his hammer can keep your mind in the gutter and away from stress (just saying).

Tip #3: Befriend Your Clit. 

This might be old news to most folks, but the clit can be a key player in solo satisfaction. According to a 2017 survey published in the Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy, experts discovered that most pussy owners say clitoral stimulation is either necessary for orgasm or enhances the experience. 

So if you haven't taken the time to become besties with your pink button, it's time to get to it — especially if you're trying to make yourself O! 

Are YOU on Your "To-Do" List?

Ready to get up close and personal with your private parts? Go forth and conquer with our detailed orgasm guide. Whether you're new to O town or could Simpli use some guidance, the tips listed above are sure to help you cum. 

Just be sure to go slow and listen to your body. If something doesn't feel good, stop what you're doing and try something else. And remember — practice makes perfect!

Here at Simpli Pleasures, we believe sex and play is not only a lot of fun and good for the soul but also empowering. That’s why we’ve rounded out our collection of high-quality products to inspire people so that they can express themselves and feel good while doing it. 

From self-care to partner play, from foreplay to long distance, from routine to spontaneity — we believe it should Simpli be fun.

Check us out today and see how we can make you cum tomorrow. 



Study reveals how Americans like to masturbate | NY Post

How and Why to Practice Self-care | Mental Health First Aid

Differences in Orgasm Frequency Among Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, and Heterosexual Men and Women in a U.S. National Sample | Springer

Orgasmic dysfunction in women | MedlinePlus Medical Encyclopedia

Orgasm - an overview | ScienceDirect Topics

Associations Among Physiological and Subjective Sexual Response, Sexual Desire, and Salivary Steroid Hormones in Healthy Premenopausal Women | JSM

The role of orgasm in the development and shaping of partner preferences | PMC

Sex and Sleep: Perceptions of Sex as a Sleep Promoting Behavior in the General Adult Population | Frontier

Prevalence and Characteristics of Vibrator Use by Women in the United States: Results from a Nationally Representative Study | The Journal of Sexual Medicine

Picking up good vibrations: Discrepant vibrator use, sexual functioning, and sexual well-being in women with male partners | T and F Online

Back to blog